Adapting your communication style as a leader to suit your team
One of the biggest myths in leadership is that once you have the title, people will automatically listen. They won’t, and while it’s not because they’re difficult, disengaged or resistant it’s actually because comms simply doesn’t work that way. Humans don’t receive information uniformly. We interpret, filter, ignore, embrace or resist messages based on who we are, how we work, what we value, and the context we’re operating in.
That’s why this blog focuses on a deceptively simple idea: adapting your communication style for your team. Simple to say. Much harder to do well.
The “osmosis” problem in leadership
Many leaders step into management roles without ever being taught how to lead people. You’re promoted because you’re technically strong, experienced, and reliable. Now, you’re also expected to communicate clearly, motivate others, manage performance, and build trust. Often without any real training, which is where the assumption seems to be that leadership communication just… happens. That you’ll pick it up by osmosis… but leadership is about connection, which requires intention.
There is no “one size fits all” message
One of the fastest ways to lose your team is to assume that because you understand a message, everyone else will too. People differ in:
how they prefer to receive information
how much detail they need
whether they process internally or out loud
whether they care more about why or how
what’s happening around them when the message lands
A leader who sends a long, corporate email and assumes the job is done is often missing the point entirely, because communication isn’t complete when it’s sent, but rather when it’s understood.
Context matters more than you think
A message doesn’t land in a vacuum. More specifically, think of a frontline worker finishing a 12-hour shift; they don’t experience communication the same way as someone at a desk all day. A call centre employee doesn’t have time to read a carefully crafted intranet article and a team under pressure will interpret even neutral messages through a lens of stress and fatigue. Which is why great leaders don’t just think about what they’re saying, but when, where and how it will be received.
Adaptation doesn’t mean being fake
This is where many leaders get stuck. “If I change how I communicate, am I still being authentic?” Yes, if you’re doing it properly. Adapting your communication style doesn’t mean abandoning your values, your personality or your humanity, it just means adjusting the delivery, not the intent. You can still be direct, warm and even decisive. However, you just can’t expect everyone to meet you exactly where you are.
The power of a “user manual of me”
One of the most practical tools Prina Shah notes is creating a simple “user manual” or playbook for how people prefer to work and communicate.
This might include:
how you like information presented
what stresses you out at work
how you prefer feedback
what helps when you’re under pressure
how others can work best with you
When teams share this openly, misunderstandings reduce, assumptions disappear, and people start adapting naturally. Though the key is that this goes both ways, as in, your preferences (even as a leader) don’t override anyone else’s and they’re never an excuse for poor behaviour.
It’s worth remembering that people won’t just trust you because of your title, but what you do after you get it. There’s a simple but powerful progression at play:
People need to know you
Then they may like or respect you
Only then does trust develop
Listening is often the fastest way to build all three, and when roles change, communication must change too. Not to mention that leadership transitions, like the following, add another layer of complexity:
becoming the boss of former peers
managing people older or more experienced than you
stepping into a team that already has history and dynamics
In these moments, communication has to have boundaries, collaboration and humility where you can still invite input, explain your thinking and acknowledge experience.
So, what should leaders actually do?
If you’re leading a team right now, start here:
Ask your team how they prefer to communicate — and listen properly
Pay attention to context, not just content
Use tools as conversation starters, not labels
Be clear about boundaries when roles change
Partner with your internal communications experts early
Remember that trust is built through consistency, not authority
